Save

As much as you like to think so, you cannot save every stray animal, wandering soul, sick person, the planet and the Universe, so you may as well take a little time and save yourself. Words of wisdom from a dear friend. Truth ringing in my ears, but not quite convincing me to stop and smell the flowers; and yes I get the irony.
I should probably post this as well to Beacons blog, because it is he who has me thinking this early a.m. He could not sleep. Up and down all night. Nudging me to rub his head, cuddle with him, only to have him dart off the edge of the bed and to the door.  Finally I gave in and let him go. Out the door and down the steps, like a dash, on his two front legs. This is only happening because I too am up. Otherwise he would realize that he was alone in the dark, and it would begin, an unending cry of epic proportions. Unending until I walk down the stairs, grab him in my arms and take him back to bed. This could go on many times throughout a night. When he is restless I am restless. So here we are.
Beacon is two years old this month, and looking back over our journey so far, I can say that I have become an expert at reading him. He goes through cycles which are primarily based on his body's digestive tract, and his ability to utilize food and process waste.
Later today he will be out like a light. Most days he is like this. The stress of getting around, the energy expended is much more noticeable now that he is fully grown. Yet that doesn't stop him when he is on a roll. He, can out maneuver all of the other cats, out run them and out fox them. The only thing he can't do is jump. So he has learned to pull himself up on furniture, maneuver onto table tops and on some occasions, get stuck, scaring the crap out of me. Which prompts me to make the rounds throughout the day, looking for him, making sure he is safe.
In all honesty, I do not believe that I can save the world, or myself. At least not in a way that would be efficient. I do feel however that I am saved. Not in a religious way, but in a way that allows me to be at ease in the world. For as much as I may seem restless, I am very much at peace with life. Adhering to the Tao Pooh philosophy I focus my attention to the present moment. Always observant, always taking it all in. It is amazing how much we are able to understand through calm and silence. Amazing how easy it is to let go. Knowing that the extraneous things that define me today, I can walk away from at any moment and be complete. Knowing that blood is thicker than water, and that beating hearts trump everything else.